Don’t Be Realistic!

How often have you heard people say,

“Be Realistic,”

right after you have told them all about one of your dreams?

These lovely people are called, “dream stealers” and although they may think that they are being helpful to you to keep you on the ground and be ‘realistic’ what they really are doing is damaging your beliefs, your visions.

It is so incredibly important to surround yourself with positive people who honestly believe in your visions and goals and truly want to see you succeed.

These are the people who will help you achieve your goals.

Unfortunately in your life, you will find them all around you and your child, you will come across these ‘dream stealers’.

They are in your close circle of friends and family and they are hard to avoid.

It is very important to keep you and your child motivated towards your own true goals and to put up an imaginary wall between your “well-meaning loved ones” and yourself and your own family that you wish to protect.

It happens to me daily. I constantly get told by well meaning family members or friends that my visions and dreams are ‘unrealistic’ and that I should be ‘real’ and just live my life the way that they think I should.

If you’ve viewed my ‘mind movie’ then you will already know some of my own personal goals and dreams and you will know that homeschooling my own children and teaching other children about money are two very important and personal goals of mine.

Yesterday, my father-in-law, although in his mind “meant to be helpful and supportive”, told me straight out that my children should be in school and that he had already noticed that my children were falling behind socially because of this ‘lack’ of socialization that homeschooling brings.

Now had I not had the supportive friends that I am blessed to have and also had I not had an incredibly supportive husband, then I may have taken my father-in-law’s remarks straight to my heart and felt that I was doing harm to my children by following my dreams etc. etc.

Instead, however, solid in my goals and visions and constantly surrounded by positive and inspirational, supportive friends, I was able to look past this remark and see what was really behind it.

Here are some points about his remarks that I will share with you so that you too, may be able to look past the remarks of your own ‘well-meaning’ friends and family and know that there are other people out in the world just like you who also need support and that you are not alone in your dreams.

1. Firstly, I must tell you that my father-in-law is a teacher and so must take it at some level personally that we chose not to send our children to school.

I can fully understand his concern. School is what he knows, this is what he feels comfortable with.

I am confident that if he took the time to really get a full understanding of all that is involved with homeschooling socially then he would change his perception.

2. Secondly, his perception of my children’s lack of socialisation skills was also affected by the fact that he had only ever observed their social behaviours in a country where they didn’t speak the native language.

Had he seen how they react socially in an English speaking society instead of the Dutch speaking society of his island then he would have been better able to see that my children were a little bit at a disadvantage.

Most children would feel slightly out of place in a country where they do not speak the language.

Ironically, the beauty of us taking this trip to this beautiful Dutch speaking Caribbean island, is that my children are now learning to speak Dutch and are making many new and interesting friends.

Again, had I not had that solid background of exceptional support people in my life then I’m sure I would have found it incredibly hard to deal with these types of negative comments and would surely take most of them very personally.

Now, however, even though it will still never feel nice to have ‘dream stealers’, I am able to take a step back out of the situation and see their comments for what they really are.

You have a support network here. We truly want to see you succeed.

I look forward to reading your comments on this post and reading your own experiences to share with our readers so we can continue to build a strong positive support group for each other as we follow our dreams for ourselves and our children.

Cheers……Amanda van der Gulik……Excited Life Enthusiast!